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Before You Go- Overcoming Anxiety

8/22/2015

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Fun Fact About Me: Over the past few years I have secretly been battling severe anxiety and depression. I have come a long way on my journey, this past year especially, and am so thankful for the love and support given to me by my close friends and loving husband through it all. While going through old files on my computer, I came across a poem I wrote during an anxiety attack. I began using my love for writing to release my emotions and help strengthen my healing process. Upon reading this again many months later, I am very pleased with how far I have come. I'm sure anyone battling anxiety can relate to the majority of this piece. Please read through to the end, as I hope it may inspire and help you on your own journey. Please feel free to share. <3

Before You Go

So much time is wasted.
How often are you lost in thought?
Trapped within a whirlwind of emotions, You can't stay grounded.
You're lost inside yourself.

Numb.
Numb to the world around you, to what's standing right before your own eyes.
A blank slate.
In a vegetative state.
A water balloon about to pop.
So much pressure building up from the inside out, these words won't stop.
Soon you will burst.
Stop your mind before your heart stops beating.

FOCUS.

Thump thump. Thump thump.
It starts off slow, so slow you begin to wonder if you still have a heart at all.
Perhaps your mind has just taken over and soon your lungs will give out.
Perhaps this is the end after all.
Is this how I go? 
In a motionless state, just waiting for the next organ to shut down...
You try to breathe.
It only hurts.
THUMP thump thump THUMP thump thump.
Now it won't stop.
THUMP thump thump THUMP thump thump.
The beat gets faster, the breathing harder. Tears begin to stream down from the eyes.
You feel as though your body is going to let go.
Fear is taking over.
You're giving up, ready to jump, just throw it all away...
You can't do this alone anymore. You have no desire to try.
You believe this is the only way out.
This tsunami, this hurricane, this eruption of emotions are consuming you.
Eating you alive.
...Silence...
Before you go, remember one thing. The most important words you will ever know...
You are loved, and
Love conquers all.



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